Love: 7 Simple Things to Look For in a Life-Partner
Love is a great thing that really goes deeper than butterflies in the stomach and feeling some kind of chemistry. While these things may have their place, they have been given too much prominence in recent times and at the expense of other equally important things. Romance, love proclamations, presents and fine dining can go a long way in a making a relationship sweeter but the truth is that love that will last will need much more than these things.
If you are planning to spend the rest of your life with someone, you will need to go past a lot of superficial stuff to really be able to determine if both of you will be able to make it last. Fidelity, honesty and commitment are part of the equation for a long-lasting relationship but there are also very simple things that can go a long way to tell if a relationship will make it or not.
Here are thongs to look for in that person you want to spend the rest of your life with:
You enjoy their company
How do you want to live and make a life with someone whose company you don’t enjoy or whose style of conversation and interaction you don’t understand? It really doesn’t make sense to think you are going to be able to cope for the really long time that a lifetime commitment often involves. No matter how cute, interesting, or smart you think a person, you shouldn’t hook up with them if you don’t understand them or get them.
This seemingly simple issue may cause you problems in the future.
You can laugh at their jokes
You won’t be able to fake it all your life. If you don’t get a person’s sense of humour, you need to really consider if you’ll be able to spend the rest of your life being bored or pretend to laugh at jokes you don’t find funny. Certain things should come easy in a relationship without any work because they often serve as the cushion for the times when things get tough and uncertain. A compatible sense of humour between couples is one of those things.
You accept their flaws
No matter how much you love a person, you should not make a lifetime commitment to them if you have not come to accept their flaws, whether it is physically or in character. While acceptance may improve over time, there should be a level of acceptance for a person’s flaws before moving into a relationship with them especially a commitment like marriage
You can see them at their worst
If you are still carrying unrealistic ideas that your partners is always going to look all dressed, made up and beautiful, you may be living in fantasy land. This kind of unrealistic understanding of relationships and impossible expectations from a relationship has no place in a long-term relationships.
Physically, emotionally and psychologically, you are going to see your partner in many shades and many of them will be shocking and unpalatable. If you have unrealistic expectations that things will always be perfect, you may not be able to handle the kind of familiarity and intensity that lifetime commitments bring up in a relationship.
You know they will disappoint you sometimes
Many relationships have broken down because one or both parties have not factored in the fact that their spouse or partner is human and will make many mistakes. Where people do not factor in the imperfections and capability to err of their partners, they often find it hard to forgive when their partners eventually disappoint them.
You’re proud of who they are
You partner doesn’t have to look like a model or a celebrity but you have to be proud of who they are and how they look. If you are ashamed of your partners look, status or anything else about them, you need to hold off on making a more serious commitment. This is the person you’ll be spending your life with and if you can’t stand to be seen or associated with him or her, it’s a really big deal.
You can talk to them
You should be able to talk to the person you want to spend the rest of your life with. It doesn’t have to be as long or as elaborate as other people do but you should be able to communicate with them in a deep and intimate way. Being able to talk to them means you have a way of being able to persuade them, to correct them and generally make them understand and agree with you. You should also be able to get them to bare their heart to you and you should be able to understand how they communicate and what they mean per time. While understanding and communication improves over time in a relationship, if you cannot understand and get your partner to understand you, your life together as a couple might be harder than necessary