4. Finding fault habitually
Habitual criticism and fault-finding is a bad thing when raising children. When you do this, you are constantly shifting focus to their short-comings, which will definitely poke at their confidence. Criticism should be replaced with loving correction that looks for solutions and encourages them to rise above, not just pointing out what is wrong.
When you are a habitual fault-finder as a parent, your children may need to keep away from you to find their true selves. They may eventually become strangers to you because they are likely to hide their plans, mistakes and even achievements from you because they don’t want you to colour it with negativity.
5. Too much advice
Advising your children about everything is not so good; sometimes you allow them to do things the way they think it best.
When you counteract all their plans and actions with your own advice, it may communicate to them that their reasoning or planning abilities are in some way inferior or defective.
It is a good thing to form a habit of listening to your children’s plans without always trying to suggest something or advise. It is a sign of respect and respect build confidence.
When you eventually offer a word of advice, they take it very seriously.
6. Not letting them know you love them
It may sound cliché but it is true; when you don’t make conscious effort to communicate to your children that you love and care for them, you may be killing their confidence. Tell your children you love them and show them through you dedication, attention and even correction that you love them; you’re building their confidence.
There is something about knowing that one is loved, no matter what happens, that gives one confidence and builds self-esteem.
7. Not dealing with your own insecurities
This is huge but a lot of parents don’t know it. If you have kids or are planning to have kids, it is paramount that you take time to address your own fears, insecurities and confidence issues. This will help you more than anything else to set an example of confident living and instill confidence in them.
Most parents who are controlling, tyrannical and engage in other habits that diminish the confidence of their children are insecure and fearful.
So dealing with your insecurities, fears and issues is actually the first and foundational step to being able to raise confident kids. Get help if you need to.